Thursday, July 15, 2010

Scenes from an Astorian apartment

Scene 1: Monday night. Meeting the new subletter for the first time. Toasty Subway sandwich crinkling in my bag. Visions of french fries in my head. I walk into a dark and what seems to be, empty apartment. I make my way to the living room, where my new "roommate" is creepily sitting on the couch, not saying anything so I think I am alone in the apartment...

Me: Oh! Hi! (nervous laugh) I thought no one was here! (Walk over and shake hands) It's so nice to meet you.

Her: Yea. (Awkward stare/smile/chuckle)

Me: (Nervous jabbering) So, how was your move yesterday?

Her: Uh. (shrug) Fine.

Me: Oh...good. It's so hot! (walk over to my little fan - place it on the coffee table) I usually put this on and face it right towards definitely helps ...(awkward pause)... Do you have any questions or concerns about the apartment?

Her: (Stare) No.

Me: (Thinking: I am not sober enough for this. Sit down on couch.Glance over at her laptop.) Ooo! Are you watching True Blood? What season?

Her: Uh...this season...this current season.

Me: Oh...Cool...I just finished the 1st one. I loved it.

Her: (stare)

Me: Sorry if I'm not making much sense. I'm a little drunk. I just got back from book club (nervous laugh) It was my first one with my old roommate's friends and I hadn't eaten all one big glass just went straight to my head.

Her: (uncomfortable pity laugh)

Me: Okay...well I'll leave you too it. I'm going to go make some french fries...