"In Jewish Tradition, it is a mitzvah, a good deed, to invite those who are traveling or without a seder. For one night everyone is mishpucha - family."

So I've avoided this post for a while because every time I go to write it, I come off as a crazy person.....kind of like when I debated sending a "support" letter to Britney Spears when she was at her most......unstable. I thought surely, this was the right time to swoop in and become her best friend; get her back on track, you know? But, I could never get the tone right and would come off as a psycho fan who had Hit Me Baby One More Time and Gimme More posters lining her walls.

Dear Britney,
I  love you. I really think we could be best friends. You should really think about getting your shit together.......

Dear Britney,
We should hang out some time.....

Dear Britney,
I'm nuts....

Anyway, I say this because I don't want you to think I'm crazy. Or that I'm being ironic when I say that I love Jewish people. No, I don't have posters of Moses and Woody Allen lining my walls, but I do have a great appreciation for everything that has to do with those I affectionately refer to as the Chosen People. And I apologize in advance if I offend you with my flippant language but rest assured my affection is genuine.

Whenever I meet someone who is Jewish, I am star-of-David-struck. "You're Jewish? Oh my G_d, I love the Jews!" which then prompts the cocked head, inquisitive brow look, "Are you Jewish?" at which point I answer,"Me? *disappointed sigh* No. I love Jesus.....But he was a Jew too, so....." which I follow with a noncommittal shrug.


I don't know where this love comes from. My cousin, A,  is Jewish, and she's pretty much one of the funniest and kindest people I know, so maybe it stemmed from there. Like most Jews, she's been given the gift of story-telling and humor. When we get together, besides the constant playful jabs at each others' religious affiliations, she will have the entire room in stitches, tears streaming down our faces, stomachs aching from our constant giggles due to detailed accounts of her hilariously unique adventures. Unique in that only she would be accosted by a rabbi on her way to class so she could participate in some random Jewish holiday involving a pineapple and a wooden cane. Or only she would get locked out of her yeshiva (in Israel) on a Friday because she forgot that on shabbos they disable the electronic gate; and just as she's hiked up her skirt to try and climb up the wall (a no-no where all the girls are basically dressed like Amish women), the rabbi comes out of the darkness and gently prompts her to freeze in a running man position with a, "Good evening, my child."  Or only she would come home to an unexpected order of a Costco-sized box of KY jelly to go with her new Ab FlexBelt. I don't know why these things happen to her, but I have faith that they definitely have something to do with her being Jewish. :)


Not only is she my favorite Jewish cousin, but she has spoiled me with her encouragement towards my Gentile curiosity. I must confess though, this kind of freedom has made me forget that sometimes my interactions with her may seem.....offensive (?) to other Jews who don't know that my love for their culture is pure. However, rest assured that I do try to keep my chutzpah to a minimum.

Anyway, when I was at a used book fair, I saw this lime green treasure peeking out from the pile and had to have it. The Matzo Ball Heiress by Laurie Gwen Shapiro. Chick-lit and matzo? L'chiam! 

Reasons why I loved it:


Yiddish - check
Self-deprecating Jewish humor - check
Hot Jewish men - check
Girlfriend with the last name Hitler - check


What else could a Jew-loving shiska ask for? Baruch hashem, let the hilarity ensue!